Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Pilates and PE

I figured out why I don't like my Pilates book. It isn't PILATES, it is all crunches and legs lifts. Throw in a fat lesbian or a football coach in the midst of roid rage and you have my high school PE class.

I HATED PE. I hated it all through school. I managed to get into it with every single PE teacher I ever had. In elem school, I kicked my PE in the knee because he thought I wasn't stretching well enough so he decided to help me. He pushed my leg up further than I wanted it so I reared my other leg back and unleashed on his locked knee. I got sent to the principal's office over it.

Freshman year in high school, I told my PE teacher (the fat lesbian)that I would run as soon as she did. She was pissed. Later in the year, she tried to give me a same day detention (against school policy) and I walked out the of the class. She called my mom and mom told her to take a flying leap.

Sophomore year, I got thrown out of my PE class. I refused to dress one day for some reason or another (any excuse I could come up with was good enough for me) and the coach (roid boy) told me that I had to dress. The rest of teh conversation went sort of like this:
Me: yeah, I'm so not doing that.
RB: you are REQUIRED to dress for this class
Me: I'd like to see you try and make me
RB: you will dress!!!! or you can go sit in the office for the rest of the class period.
Me: *thinking* I could sit in the air conditioned office, in a comfy chair or in the hot, smelly gym on the hard floor. DuhI'm outta here.

I flunked PE one quarter and had to quit pissing off the coaches for the next quarter because if you flunked the whole semester, you had to repeat it next year. My junior year, I fully loaded my schedule so I wouldn't have to take PE, because I was "college bound". My senior year, I decided "screw it" and took only the bare minimum of classes to keep me out of PE. It wasn't like I needed the credits. You had to have 16 to graduate and I had that by the middle of my junior year. Without flunking classes, I'm not sure how you could manage to not have 16 credits but some people did.

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