Thursday, June 26, 2008

Swimsuits and body image

I'm a fat girl. I know this, but somehow, in my mind, I'm not nearly as big as I actually am. I'm constantly surprised and disappointed when 14s don't fit. You would think after nearly 7 years of being a fat girl, I would be used to this, but I'm not. I'm completely deluded about my actual size. And although, I wouldn't say no to being smaller, I have no desire to change anything about the way I do things. I've been working out, not to lose weight but to get in better shape to be able to chase the kids, play etc. Thus, if I could find a swimsuit with a decent top, I would absolutely buy a bikini. This is the suit we got for Ms Thang and if they made big girl suits with tops like that instead of like this, I would buy one in a heart beat (they also need to have higher rise bottoms but I can find those elsewhere, no biggie). Instead, when I get another suit, I will probably get this one. I want a new suit because I'm not happy with the one I got but it was what I could find, where I was, for what I was willing to spend. Being of the plus variety, that severely limited my choices. Since I just bought it, I will suck it up and wait for it to fall apart (which as often as we swim, should be before the end of summer) and then buy it.

Unfortunately, Ms. Thang has inherited my swimsuit problems. She just has other issues. We tried on 10 suits before we found something that even sort of worked. The one pieces were all too short because she is long waisted. Anything that fit through the butt was way too short and the neck barely hit her mid chest. That forced us into 2 piece terriory which had problems all it's own. Some of them fit across the chest but had huge saggy butts. Apparently, all kids who wear a 5T must still be in diapers because all the suits were cut for the extra baggage. Going smaller to get the butt to fit made the top not fit right. We found one that fit both but flaired across her stomach and would have floated up and been annoying in the water. We finally settled on the above one which fit across the chest and hips and was only a little saggy in her butt.


Lavender Lemonade said...

I could have written that part about I think I'm smaller than I actually am part. I'm still shocked that 90% of my wardrobe doesn't fit. And I'm shocked every time I begrudgingly have to go shopping and buy an item of clothing that I can't shop where the "normal" clothes are...I have find whatever eupheiusm they made up for fat women. Last year, my sister started to take on my wardrobe problems as a personal mission...until she discovered what size I was and what is available in that size (at big box stores)...uh, nothing attractive. Now, she knows why I look like a slob all the time. Oh, and swimsuits...I just completely block it all out of my mind...the only reason I wear a swimsuit is so that I can be with my kids at the pool, water park, backyard sprinkler, etc. There is no joy in swimsuit wearing, for me its like applying bug repellent or sunscreen, just something I do. And I push out all thoughts of discomfort from my mind.
Growing up I had a long torso like MT, they use to (maybe they still do?) make swimsuits that are "long" in the body. Probably not as cute as that little purple bikini though. :)

Ros said...

Does it help at all to remind you that in bathing suits, you have to go up 2 sizes from what you wear in street clothes? Yup, it makes no sense whatsoever, but does anything about clothing sizes make sense?

The Fearless Freak said...

I hadn't ever heard that. I wear the same size in swim wear as I do in street clothes so I never thought about it.

But you are right, nothing (like the fact that cheaper clothes require bigger sizes) about clothing sizes makes sense.

Looseyfur said...

I have four suits in sizes 12-20W. All two pieces, and various tankinis so I can swap them out depending on what the hell my body looks like. Post partum I was a 20W on bottom and an 18 top. Now I'm a 16 top and 16/18 bottom. Most of mine came from target, but they were from two seasons ago when they made "brief type" bottoms with higher cut legs (so they cover the baby pouch) and the tops were long enough to cover my entire belly.

Unlike Lavender I'm not surprised by my size because I've been up and down a lot over the last 10 years, but I have taken on her same attitude.

I want to go swimming with my kid -- a swimsuit is required wear. But with 60 percent of American women being a size 14 or larger... you'd think that there's be better stuff out there. Sigh.